Want to know how to totally undercut any chance of being productive on this Friday? Well here you go, a comprehensive ranking of every Seinfeld episode ever. While I personally feel The Merv Griffin Show and The Pool Guy are hard done by here, it's still tough to argue with the breakdown provided incredulously by Vulture. Enjoy...
At long last, you can clear all those syndicated Seinfeld episodes off your DVR. Following years of speculation about when and where the historic sitcom would arrive online, today it finally became available to stream on Hulu. But with 169* episodes in the Seinfeld archive, it's understandable if you're intimidated by the the idea of entering the vault without a guide.
In the interest of both helping novices prioritize and reminding veterans about forgotten jewels, we've ranked every episode in the series from worst to best. The ratings are based less on cultural significance — you'll find many recognizable episodes fairly low on the list — and more on the density and quality of jokes, the inclusion of multiple strong narrative arcs, and, to a lesser extent, how well the comedy and stories have aged.
That said, even the worst (well, maybe the fourth-worst) episode of Seinfeld is better than most of what you'll currently find on network TV — and now it's just a Hulu account away. The bingeing is going to be real, and it's going to be spectacular.
*We arrived at a count of 169** by considering all two-part and hour-long episodes as single entries. We also omitted the retrospective. With every episode now available on-demand, why waste time watching highlights?
** Correction: This ranking initially included only 168 episodes. The 169th (No. 58) has since been added and the ranking adjusted.
169. "The Puerto Rican Day Parade" (Season 9). An episode so racially offensive that NBC had to apologize upon its airing, the second-greatest crime that "The Puerto Rican Day Parade" commits is simply not being funny enough. It's the loosest version of a bottle episode to come out of the writers' room — and of all the bottle episodes in Seinfeld's run, it's the dullest, full stop.
168. "The Outing" (Season 4). After four seasons spent using George's homophobia as a character flaw, the show wholeheartedly embraces gay panic as a plot device to a nonsensical, largely unfunny degree. The phrase "Not that there's anything wrong with that" ascends to pop-culture permanency after a practical joke played by Elaine causes a college newspaper reporter to mistake George and Jerry as lovers.
167. "The Finale" (Season 9). Is the final episode of Seinfeld really that bad? They get what they deserve! It's a long time coming! Symbolically, it's perfect! But upon rewatching, you realize that, yeah, it is that bad. Not even the minor revelation that George cheated during "The Contest" can save what is an uninspired parade of guest stars and forgotten characters. The final scene's callback to Seinfeld's first episode is a cute touch, but it's not enough to save "The Finale"'s reputation as one of Seinfeld's lowest points.
Enjoy the rest of the list HERE.
